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Giving people control

by Stephanie Hurd in Uncategorized
February 28, 2014 0 comments

I had an experience last week in which I gave up my control. It is something I am working on as when you have ADHD, you often feel incompetent. It is almost easier to let everyone else control your life and tell you how to do it “right”. This way may not be right for you but it is right for them. I have dealt with this time and time again.

When I was younger, I let my sister take control and fill out all the paperwork for me to go to school. I never learned how to do it myself. I figured, she is smarter and better than me.

She did it so often, Sara actually convinced me to take courses I didn’t need, thinking I should become what she was becoming.

Is there way better than my way? I would let decisions be made for me thinking my way was a for of being out of control. However, I have learned otherwise. In order to become the best me, I have to take responsibility for myself. This often means, making my own decisions.

For instance what happened last week. I gave my power to my father, allowing him to step on me and make me feel like I was nothing. I let him get to me, let him make me cry. It effected my whole night, I was not able to sleep until late.

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When we give our choices to someone else out of fear, we let our outer selves look weak and often allow people to step on us. I am trying harder to call people on the often degrading things I once allowed people to do to me. They presumed me weak because I had a tolerant heart.

I even had a friend at work once throw a piece of crumpled paper at my head, didn’t yell back at them nor did I tell them that was not appropriate. Why did I let people do that? Why did I let them push me around?

I knew I was different, things people could easily do, I had trouble with. However, now I know that doesn’t make me less of a person. I will continue on working on my power and the beautiful person within me.

It isn’t easy to realize your voice is important but it is worth it.

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