I’m still human and learning and falling on my butt plenty of times as I continue to learn lessons. I’ve been told this humility eventually leads to wisdom by being open to learning from our mistakes, even if in the moment of blinding pain we don’t think it’s our fault.
Friday night, I was eagerly helping my wife out as she cooked. It’s a real treat for me when she cooks. As an ADHDer she can be very creative in the kitchen when she gets going, but if things aren’t in place with the stove cleared and dishes clean it is difficult for her to get going. I try to help her as I benefit from a good meal as well as slowly working on systems for us to keep the kitchen functional without overwhelming myself.
One thing I’ve noticed about ADHDers and it’s also frequently an organizational suggestion to help them is they need to see things in order to go about their creative projects. This is probably why so many ADHD organizational coaches stress getting clear plastic boxes for ADHDers. When ADHDers go about their projects whether it be in the kitchen or the art room it seems they need that visual security that they can access all of their tools. I think this is part of the reason they have such trouble closing drawers and cabinets and other general cleanup when they are done. It’s much easier in their mind in the future to get at things if it’s out rather than to constantly have to close them up only to bring them out again in the future.
It makes some sense even to my non-ADHD mind, but it can lead to some frustrating clutter and even accidents.
So there I am on Friday night about to enjoy a delicious and colourful dinner from my wife. She asks for some vinegar from a bottom cupboard and as I come up I hit my head on the open cupboard above me.
Aim for CTET and then, land yourself a slovak-republic.org levitra viagra price secure job. But, if you’re experiencing these issues on account of use of finasteride, use of these medications might be explored to determine if they’re able to help you. canada cialis online In this way, a PDE-blocker medicine acts to increase blood flow into the penis during sexual stimulation in order to avoid any negative effects. http://www.slovak-republic.org/history/medieval-hungary/ viagra cheapest pharmacy can help people to gain back the lost energy. What is physical therapy or physiotherapy? Physiotherapy consist of manual therapies, exercise programs and assistive devices levitra sample slovak-republic.org to help with dressing, cooking, or bathing. It hurt a lot and though I try to curb my tongue I did let out a cuss word as I screamed in pain. Then in angered frustration to deal with the pain I proceeded to go around the kitchen and slam every open cupboard shut.
My anger and tantrum subsided in less than a minute yet the pain and hurt had gone beyond my noggin. My wife had fled the room scared as I’m normally a very calm person. She felt my pain intensely as well as sensed some of the blame I had for her in my swift retribution to the cupboard door that had dared to offend me.
Although I was now quickly defused from the outburst and ready to eat the tasty dinner she was still wound up from my pain and anger. This is another trait I’ve noticed among ADHDers is that they are very empathic and they can feed off of other people’s strong emotions and energies. This is great when you are at a party and getting a charge of fun, but it can be debilitating when dealing with negative emotions, especially when they are so internalized.
Being an introvert, I’m naturally well equipped for insulating myself from others emotions whether they be positive or negative. My preferred course of action would be to continue on with dinner and get back on course. That is probably not the way when dealing with an empathic ADHDer.
After the initial shock and barrage of emotions it’s almost as if the empath is so overwhelmed that she shuts off her sensors and stays mired in the cess pool of emotions that have just flooded over her. She hasn’t yet developed the skills to let it flow out of her and sometimes needs a little help. She’s an empath, not a mind reader.
I let things go quiet too long between us. I was fine, but her mind was going at cyberspeed through all of her fears about what had just transpired as only an ADHDer can. What I should have done and will endeavour to do more of in the future that just like I gave a verbal yelp of pain I can also give verbal clues to her as soon as I am able to let her know that I’m OK and I’m sorry for scaring her. It’ll help her open up her sensors again to receiving the empathic signal that it is OK to move on.
As an empath or those who deal with a sensitive loved one what are some strategies that you’ve seen that work?